Nicholas Georgiou Durham The simple harmonic urn is a generalized P\'{o}lya urn model with two types of ball. If the drawn ball is red it is replaced together with a black ball, but if the drawn ball is black it is replaced and a red ball is thrown out of the urn. When only black balls remain, the roles of the colours are swapped and the process restarts. This process can be viewed as a stochastic process on $\mathbb{Z}^2$, that approximates the phase-portrait of simple harmonic motion. We will show that the resulting Markov chain is transient, but only just so: if we throw out a ball every time the colours swap, then the process becomes positive-recurrent. Along the way I will discuss the connections between the urn process and birth-death processes, a uniform renewal process and the Eulerian numbers. This is joint work with Edward Crane, Stanislav Volkov, Andrew Wade and Robert Waters.